I Failed

I Failed

I am letting my demons take over.

No matter how hard I tried they won.

I finally realized I was the whole struggle.

I could not make this "life" better.

I tried and tried, over and over again.

I thought, to survive I needed a man

Or at least one more person other than

My own bloodline, my family who 

Cared, loved, missed, understood me.

It was in vain like I said.

There is no heart left to take,

To shatter, to play, to break.

I lost it all when he went.

Only reason of my breathing was my mother

I could not disappoint her deliberately.

I basically could not kill myself knowing she is still alive.

She tried so hard to raise me good, raise me safely.

There will be only photos

Or memories left behind.

When I finally close my eyes,

I will achieve to kill myself at once.